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I suppose my first recollection of wearing anything feminine was at
around the age of six when my grandmother thought it would be cute to
put a dress on me. I can remember that I really loved the feeling and
especially the 'fuss' that everyone made over me when I had it on. Both
my
parents were there and when theysaw me they said they thought I was so
cute! It was at that point that I knew I preferred girl's things rather
than the dull clothes that boys always wore.
This introduction to the wonderful world of femininity was soon
followed by frequent
exploratory trips to my mother's closets and lingerie drawers when the
opportunity presented itself. Over a period of time more and more items
of feminine apparel were brought into use until eventually I was
wearing bras, panties, stockings, etc. I even got to a point where I
would paint my toenails and leave them that way since I knew no one
would know it
except me as long as I kept my shoes and socks on. I also wore
earrings.
As I got older I gradually obtained a collection of my own things which
I thought I had kept hidden pretty well. My mother once found my stash
of feminine goodies, but oddly enough she never mentioned anything
about it. I think she already had an idea as to what I was doing and I
can only imagine that she saw no harm in it and wanted to spare me from
being embarrassed about it.
Once puberty began to come into play, crossdressing proved to add an
element of sexual arousal to the hormones already awakening my
sexuality. Even today there are times when it provides me with an extra
added thrill in this way.
At one time I had a girlfriend who, through a series of coincidences,
decided it would be fun to dress me enfemme. Since we had no wig, we
couldn't go all the way with this, but I thoroughly enjoyed it every
time she would dress me up. She never did know how much I was truly
enjoying it and I'm positive that she was totally unaware of the
desperate need she was fulfilling by helping me to dress this way. I
was loving every minute of this feminine time, but I wanted so much for
others to see me.
My first marriage was rather short lived and ended in a divorce.
However, as far as I know, the divorce wasn't due to crossdressing.
About 6 months after this divorce was final was when I met the woman I
am now married to. I thought I must have stumbled into a bit of
paradise one night before we were married when she wanted to paint my
toenails. As things sometimes happen, one thing can lead to another and
it wasn't long until she learned that I liked to dress up in women's
clothes. You can imagine my delight when she began helping me with
makeup and buying feminine gifts for me. It was the most awesome
feeling I had experienced up until that point in time. She also began
to take pictures of me after she had finished transforming me into the
feminine
persona I had felt inside for so long. We have even been out together
to a club as a couple of girlfriends. I have never been so terrified
and so utterly thrilled at the same time. As it turned out I apparently
passed rather well since I had no negative comments and even had a few
guys flirt with me that night.
Crossdressing is a lot of different things for different people. For
me, I feel free like I am the new person who I want to be rather than
just what everyone expects me to be. Although I have all the necessary
material items (clothes, shoes, wigs, makeup, jewelry, etc.) to dress
fully as a woman, my wife has set her foot down about shaving certain
parts of my body. I can shave my underarms, chest, butt, and some of my
"lower area", but the parts that need it most I am forbidden to shave.
Since hairy legs and arms would be most
noticeable and un-ladylike, I regrettably must usually wear long
sleeves and something that will completely cover my legs.
As far as the style of clothes I like, it depends upon where I'm
planning on being when I'm dressed. If it's possible that the public is
going to see Heather, I want to be seen as a well dressed and dignified
lady. If it's lounging at home just about anything goes, and for the
bedroom I really love silky gowns and lingerie.
Now, concerning my current
situation. When I first told my wife about my desires she liked it,
really - she liked it a lot and was even willing to help me and to try
to understand. However, she has recently seemed to recant and I get the
impression that she's trying to push Heather back into the closet she
came out of. Some of this could be my fault for overdoing it and having
Heather appear too often and if that's the case I'll work on that so as
not to lose what I've gained so far. But I suspect that her biggest
fears are those of someone finding out about Heather, and that I might
be sexually attracted to other "gurlz" like myself.
Actually I DO want to meet other crossdressers, but only for
socializing and to compare notes with each other. And I dream of going
out again as Heather and exploring this world of femininity I have
found myself in.
Other things I'd love to do are to be able to wear a wedding gown and
have lots of pictures made in it as well as other outfits. I don't have
many pictures at all and I really want to make a bunch more. I'd love
to be able to shop enfemme and try on new clothes in the store. I want
to go to the beach and to some major league baseball games enfemme. Oh,
and along that same line, I played football in high school, but I would
have much rather been a cheerleader for the team I played on.
Currently I dress in the presence of my wife about once a month.
However, I dress privately to some extent almost every day. I try to
remain true to my "classy" style of dressing most of the time, but
there are times in the bed-room that we get pretty 'risque'.
Well, that's about it. I would really love to hear from others out
there. And if you're located anywhere near the southern part of
Arkansas I love to meet you personally. There is so much we can talk
about and discuss. If you'd like to learn more about me please feel
free to email me by clicking on the email link below.
Heather
If you would like to contact Heather, you can do so by sending her an EMAIL.
